The one sure event - Death

For the samurai to learn
There's only one thing,
One last thing -
To face death unflinchingly.

- Tsukahara Bokuden (1489-1571)

In this lifetime, I have been the bringer of death; I have been the enemy of death.  On the battlefields of the Middle East, I was the instrument of death, the bringer of artillery and ruthless fire upon those who opposed our advance.  It was this road that eventually led me to the path I follow today, the enemy of death.  

I now walk a path to make sure that death is held at bay until it is truly welcome.  We all take a journey through this life.  The only thing that is certain is the passing of this lifetime.  At an early age, the age of 14, I learned that death can come at any moment.  It was an early morning on Thursday, May 20, 1982, that my father passed on to the other side.  It would be many, many years later before I accepted this moment in my life.  It only became acceptance when I realized that my dad was gone, the ones alive where those he left behind. We should live, everyday in the Here and Now.

Today, the word goes out that the man who went on to marry my mother, my stepfather, has begun his journey on the other side.  The family grieves and strives to find acceptance on the passing.  He had 70 years on the earth and fathered two wonderful men.  He provided balance to my mother.  Now he has passed on, to find what lies on the other side.

I will not tell you how he died; I will tell you how he lived.  My stepbrother summarized it nicely, “Father, Brother, Uncle, Friend, Obnoxious Jerk at times, but much more often a loving, caring man...”  This is the remembrance we must embrace.  Remember the lessons of life and not the lessons of death.  Hold those precious moments in your spirit so that they may light the path ahead.

The Samurai did not fear death.  It was a natural part of life.  We exit the womb with only one thing that is a surety.

I have no parents; I make the Heavens and the Earth my parents.

I have no home; I make the Tan T'ien my home.

I have no divine power; I make honesty my Divine Power.

I have no means; I make Docility my means.

I have no magic power; I make personality my Magic Power.

I have neither life nor death; I make A Um my Life and Death.

     - 1st Refrain, Samurai Creed, 14th Century

Situational Awareness

Not a day goes by that our fair city has another crime making the headlines.  Some blame the heat, the education system, the lack of activities for young adults, the drug problem, and on and on.  No matter what is motivating those who turn to crime, the rest of us can benefit from a good sense of situational awareness. 

Many cases I read about involved women who were attacked while they were on their cell phone.  I have a real pet peeve about people who stay glued to their cell phones a majority of the time.  I will be the ‘grumpy old guy’ and tell you that ‘in my day, while we were walking two miles uphill both ways to school in the snow’ that a cell phone was used for emergency purposes.  Nowadays, it is a fashion accessory, glued to an ear while driving, walking, and, yes, even standing at a urinal doing our business (seriously).  One detriment is the loss of situational awareness.  In the cases I cited, the women (and men are just as guilty) become so wrapped up in their conversations, they lose touch with what is going on around them.  I do a lot of walking, a lot of people watching.  You can always tell the vets, the martial artists, the ones who have some training in situational awareness.  Their gaze goes to hands, to center of body movements, to a quick glance at another person’s eyes.  Their gaze is in constant movement, not noticeable to the extreme, just quick glances to all cardinal points, expanding peripheral vision to take in every minute detail, every perspective, every moment in the Here and Now.    

Situational awareness is not just about threat assessment.  It is about soaking in the environment.  Here is an example:  Walked two miles to the river for my morning run.  A period of that walk was before the sun came up through a rough part of the city.  While my ‘senses’ were expanded, I noted several individual youths just hanging out.  I also noticed the large Savannah fountain and how nice it looked lit up.  I hit the river path for my three mile run.  About 70% of that path is cobblestone.  A different type of situational awareness is needed to make sure I navigate the stones successfully.  As I make the turn onto the river, the sun is coming up over my right shoulder.  In the river a tugboat is guiding a large cargo ship out to the sea.  Porpoising in front of the ship are Georgia bottleneck dolphins.  Shop owners are sweeping the sidewalks in front of their businesses.  Other runners pass by and we share greetings.  The city slowly rises from its slumber and a new day starts.  Can you feel the happiness?  Can you feel the joy of a new day?

Use your situational awareness to remain in the Here and Now.  Be ever cautious of those who would do you harm, but don’t let the happiness and joys of a beautiful surrounding pass you by in your journeys.  Live your life!  Have situational awareness!          

Release your power!

I had the distinct pleasure of addressing the Coastal Georgia Chapter of the American Society of Military Comptrollers this last week.  I love speaking engagements.  It comes from growing up in Texas, where front porches are the place for sit and speaks on the topic of the day.  This upbringing has greatly influenced my job as a counselor and mentor to an organization of 1200 employees.  I was asked to speak in my capacity as Disability Program Manager.  I saw it as an opportunity to speak on Disability Empowerment.  The free crab cake lunch was an added bonus.

I opened with one of my favorite quotes from Doctor Howard Thurman, an influential American author, philosopher, theologian, education and civil rights leader in the twentieth century.

“Don't ask yourself what the world needs.  Ask yourself what makes you come alive, and then go do it. Because what the world needs are people who have come alive.”

You see, deep down inside of us is power.  We all have it.  We all want to do a great job in this life.  We all have some type of knowledge and skill that can contribute to the world at large.  Empowerment is about letting this power out for humankind.  I shared a three part solution for managers on how their employees can let this power out, to empower their employees, and to build a better team.  You can just as easily replace “manager” with husband, wife, teacher, sensei, coach, sergeant, etc.  The plan works for every type of leadership role and capacity.

The book “Empowerment Takes More Than a Minute” presents three means that leaders can use to empower their subordinates.  These are sharing information with everyone, creating autonomy through boundaries and replacing the old hierarchy with self-managed teams.  We share information with everyone, allowing trust to be built up and involving everyone in the process by giving them a clear purpose and direction.  We create autonomy through boundaries, as needed, to ensure open lines of communication and feedback are occurring.  This leads to better self-managed teams.  These self-managed teams move the mission forward and continue the vision well into the future. 

The discussion went on to the broader vision of empowering our lives when working with those who are disabled.  The combat operations this nation has endured for the last ten years has created a large population of veterans who are returning with visible and invisible wounds.  Some of them need to let their power out, to be empowered.  Some of us need to teach them how to be empowered.  That is my path in life.  I am always on the lookout for a few fellow journeyers. 

I wrapped up my discussion by sharing a story from my time while I was attending the Disability Program Manager’s Course at the Defense Equal Opportunity Management Institute.  I was checking in and the hotel clerk asked me what course I was attending.  I told her and she relayed that she felt sorry for the “blind guy” who had reported in earlier.  I asked her what she meant and she said, “You know, getting to the dining facility, around base, etc.”

I asked her if he had developed blindness while he was checking in.

I met Joe later; he is a GS-15 Disability Program Manager for one of the Federal Agencies (the highest grade you can achieve.)  We had a chuckle over coffee at the Dining Facility (by the way, he did just fine navigating his way around) and he relayed his side of the story.

You see, Joe was given a second story room by that hotel clerk; in a building with no elevator, just stairs.  She may have wondered how Joe was going to be able to get around, but she didn’t empower him so he could be highly productive.

By the way, Joe let some of his power out and got himself a first floor room.

Let me close with a quote. “Disability is a matter of perception. If you can do just one thing well, you're needed by someone.”

Find your passion.  Share it with others so we can all be empowered!

Thoughts on the Rapture

Well, I wanted to welcome you to the other side of the Rapture.  If you are a friend of mine on Facebook, you know I had a little fun on May 21, 2011, the so-called Rapture prophesy of Harold Camping, an evangelist from Alameda, California.  If you do not know who I am referencing… well, nothing to see here, move along.  So why did a Buddhist, someone who walks a path of compassion, have such a frolic at the expense of another human being.  Well, it is because this man of God harkens me back to a childhood of “Revelation Churches.”

Let me fill you in on that one.  I was born and raised in a small town in Texas.  Every Sunday, we would travel to an unincorporated township where my grandma lived, a township whose population was about 300-400 and had six churches.  We attended the Church of Christ, one of two in this town.  Of course, ours was the “white” church, after all, this was south Texas and in the middle of the 70’s.  The township’s Church of Christ had broken into two churches during the era of desegregation in the 60’s.  We remained the ‘pure’ church.  Our Sunday attendance consisted of 8-12 worshippers.  Our sermons mostly consisted of quotes from Daniel and Revelations, because Proctor and Gamble had put bar codes on their products and the anti-Christ was in full force shaping the world.  I grew up knowing Ronald Wilson Reagan (count those letters, folks) was secretly shaping the world to his evil means.  Then, the light went out and came back on.

Thursday, 4:32am, May 20, 1982.  My father, who was the song leader for our congregation, passed away.  I was 14 years old, in the heart of my early teenage years, in the heart of susceptibility.   We attended services the next Sunday, where the man who oversaw our church told me that unless I repented and was baptized, I was going to hell.  Now, think about that for a second.  Fourteen, lost his father three days earlier, in the throws of grief, and a man of God is telling me I am going to hell.  It was here that I learned the First Noble Truth of Buddhism - Life is suffering.  Suffer I did.  Of course, I was baptized within the next few weeks.  I took on the mantle of replacing my father in the congregation, leading hymns and reading scripture each Sunday, mostly from Revelations, and looking for the apocalypse in every news story.  Luckily, I joined the Army in 1986, left my small town upbringing, was exposed to culture and diversity and my mind was able to break free of the shackles of my youth. 

Understand, this is not a bash on Christianity nor the Church of Christ, but just the narrow viewpoints of those who blindly follow visions of prophesy.  My path is compassion.  So, I feel compassion when I see fellow human beings following the same path I took as a child.  I feel compassion when I see a man tell his followers he knows the ultimate truth.  In that compassion, I must find some joy and love that is truly the end we must attain.  Over the next few days, if he has not taken his life, we will hear from Harold Camping, he will try to justify how he made a mistake.  It is the circle of life for these types.  I went through this in my early adult years when I confronted the man from my childhood church.  Hopefully, his followers will find some compassion for this man.  In the meantime, I will continue on my path in the here and now.

Know your enemy

The news rolls on.  One of our Nation’s most wanted fugitive has been killed.  Now, the media will twist the story around for the next days, weeks, months, etc until we get sick to death of it.  Some will get it right; others will spin it to justify whatever.  In the end, will it really matter?

My last job in the military involved a lot of battlefield assessments, observing the enemy to help determine a course of action, and providing lethal support to the main ground forces once we were committed to the battle.  So, a vast amount of time staying hidden and reporting what I saw all around me.  This mentality has really translated into what I do for a living now, as an advisor to the commander on management employee relations.  It could not be more relevant to the current news story of the day.

I have sat in amazement as co-worker after co-worker has approached me today and asked about my feelings on the operation overseas.  Some who know me very well have not had to ask at all.  They know my philosophy of “watching the battlefield and gathering intelligence before acting decisively.”  Yes, the ones who were given the task of executing this military operation have reason to celebrate their mission accomplishment.  Yes, I am proud of my fellow troopers who lost no one on this surgical strike.  But, it is early in the operation.  Those who oppose us will undoubtedly retaliate.  Now is not the time to throw a drunken frat party to celebrate the death of one man who lost his celebrated figure head years ago.  Watch the battlefield.  Gather intelligence.  Act decisively.  The question on my mind is, “Where is Ayman al-Zawahri?”  Don’t know who that is?  Then, you need to go back and re-read Sun Tzu.  Know your enemy.

Our Nation will celebrate.  The operators who were involved in the actual action will be de-briefed, take a day, then check the mission board to see what task is next.  It is the warrior way.  They know their enemy.  We should too.

One letter for everyday of the week

Here.  Now.  Seven letters.  Seven days of the week. 

Been a while since my last blog.  Some of my family knows the reason for my absence, those who do not just need to be aware that life in general offered me a challenge to grow or wither.  I chose to take the offer, push through the mud and murk to bloom on the other side. 

There are lessons to be learned when life hands you adversity.  You can cling to the sorrow, the pain, the suffering. You can spiral into doubt, depression, the sadness and despair.  You can find reasons to quit, throwing in the towel.  You can say, “I can never _____.”  Or you can live.  I am a firm believer that any amount of adversity can be overcome.  It takes perseverance.  It takes staying in the here and now, right here and right now.  It takes placing your sword over your heart.  It takes realizing that, “Even though an enemy has a blade over my heart, I will succeed.  I will win.” 

The root of what I teach veterans (of both wars abroad and at home) is the mantra of “Here and Now.”  As I stated, the words Here Now are seven letters, which I have assigned the following seven words to contemplate one day at a time.  They are H-Honesty, E-Endurance, R-Reality, E-Effort, N-Notice, O-Onward, and W-Worthy.  Let’s explore.

HONESTY is the key to staying grounded.  Look at why you are straying off course.  And then LOOK at why you are straying off course.  And once you open that path, REALLY look at why you are straying off the path.  In other words, somewhere buried deep down below the initial obstacle is the true reason.  Embrace that reason with honesty and integrity.

Have the ENDURANCE to face the challenge.  Endurance doesn’t mean going full out 110 percent.  It means keeping your eyes and mind aware through the challenge to find the opening.  It means staying the course waiting for the moment when you can make that one move that will stop the conflict.  It means persevering. 

Stay focused on REALITY, this reality, right here, right now.  Relax in the moment and let the present play out.  Is the event that is causing you distress really happening in reality?  Stop and look again.  Is the event that is causing you distress really happening in REALITY?  Think about that for a moment.

Understand there is no easy path.  We can’t just give it up to a higher power and continue to hurt.  It takes EFFORT.  Strength gainers don’t just look at a book on exercise and become stronger.  Runners don’t buy a Wii Fitness and expect to finish a road race.  Likewise, mental strength doesn’t come from not pushing yourself beyond your limits.  Push.  Put the effort in.

A key component in Here Now thinking is to NOTICE everything around you at all times.  This helps you stay grounded in the moment.  Sometimes there is an advantage in letting your mind and spirit wander.  This is good.  But, liken it to your annual vacation from work.  You reward yourself for a good year by taking that time off to relax.  Your moments that you wander should be that vacation, not the hard work you put in day after day.  By noticing your surroundings you develop the capability that no amount of adversity can surprise you. That doesn't mean staying hypervigilant, just stay aware, where you are, when you are, why you are.

When you deal with the present, keep in mind that it will slip into the past and you will press ONWARD.  In the few minutes that you have been reading this blog, time has slipped by.  You have moved onward from where you were.  How simple was that?  Those moments that threaten to derail your life are the same.  Push onward.  They will be the past in just a few moments.

The last aspect is to recognize that you are WORTHY of this effort.  You affect someone.  You also affect yourself.  You have some worth to someone.  Somehow you got to this blog.  You have worth to me just for stopping by, whether you comment or not.  Adversity can try to derail your worth, make you think there is no reason to carry on, but this is so untrue. 

I close with these two phrases from the martial path I follow.  Banpen Fugyo – 10,000 changes, no surprise.  A complex phrase with a simple message – persevere, even when faced with a blade above your heart. 

The second phrase is the essence of budo – Ganbatte Kudasai! – keep going! 

Endure, survive, because this is the here and now!

Detachment from war

I recently marked the twentieth anniversary of the ‘first’ Persian Gulf War, Operation Desert Storm.  I served with the lead brigade of the 1^st Armored Division as an Ammunition Team Sergeant on a 155mm howitzer section.  My 100 hour experience was filled with constant firing of artillery in support of the infantry and armor units to our immediate front.  For those unfamiliar with this operation, a 155mm artillery piece makes an earth shaking boom with every shot fired.  And we fired a lot.

Since that time, I have had the distinction of two more combat tours in Iraq.  Each time was something unique.  Each time had its own level of horror.  There are specific memories that bubble to the top of my consciousness, less frequently as time passes, but challenging to deal with at the least.

I think back to the times I experienced after the initial campaign in Baghdad in 2003.  We had relocated west to the town of Fallujah.  It would be these last few months that would be the pinnacle of the deployment.  These moments are the times that I spend the most energy cleansing from my spirit.  I found it remarkable that some memories that I had suppressed came flying back as I thought about my times in the deserts of the Middle East two decades ago.

They say that only the dead have seen the end of war.  That is not true.  The survivors of war live with it every day.  It shapes how we deal with people, issues, conflict and day to day interactions with the rest of humanity.  It can consume us if we let it.  Sometimes we have to make a drastic change in our lives to put the past behind us.  Sometimes we have to detach. 

Let me clarify here.  Yes, war is bullets flying while you serve your country on a foreign battlefield.  War is also surviving an abusive relationship, whether that is parental or spousal.  War is a thug who accosts you in a dark alley way as you are walking home.  War is waking up at 2:00am to realize there are burglars in your house.  War can take many forms in our lives. 

I spoke of the dangers of attachment in my last blog.  Warriors (someone engaged in or experienced in warfare) need to be able to detach from their experiences.  Warriors need to strive to constantly remain in the Here and Now.  Warriors need to be self aware to remain mindful of the dangers of becoming too attached to warfare.  It will consume the body, mind and soul.  Detach.  Empty your mind.  Have “Mushin” – no mind.  It is not an easy path.  But, neither was surviving war.